How do labels make you feel? It’s way too much pressure for me, it shifts gear for me to self-hatred for myself. I keep asking myself those questions. Who are you to think you deserve this title without earning it? Why do you need to expose yourself and convince others of your truth? Be yourself and you won’t need a title you will stay grounded and people will love you for you I believe this to be true.
be who you have to be today and brand yourself to love yourself and always remember we all have potential beyond our labels.
In my past career I began as a beautician and I ended as a stylist. I worked hard and I did gain a title of a master stylist, but never did I ever write this or put it on a business card because the pressure was too much and I wanted people to come and love me for me and not my title. I went to work daily and worked hard and gave 110% to everyone with no judgement. I just did what I loved to do and I truly believe that’s what others loved about me. I mastered my craft but I never ever knew it all in twenty four years of being in the business and that was the beauty of no title I could be green and grow. I never ever attached ego to it. It was never ever about cutting hair for me it was the social, the feel good feeling I got from enhancing beauty of another human being and making them feel beautiful inside and out and that was always my focus.
The past two years I keep hearing, what do you do? What do you work at? I realize its conversation but it’s real hard to answer and maybe it’s the feeling of shame why I am telling you all this because my dream today is still the same as I wrote in my grade seven journal. I am and always will be in the feel good business enhancing beauty because that’s my gift I see the beauty in everyone through my eyes.
I have been going through a real difficult time recently and I believe at some point we have all experienced this. I wonder if it is the pressure of social media or did this happen long before social media. I am up for an ice breaker speech in toastmasters and this is my confusion. Do I tell them who I really am or give everyone the illusion that I’m more than I am because it’s my chance to stamp my label. What do I do? Do I label myself because I have exposed myself to those new labels that are making me nauseated and it’s not because I can’t be the label because I know I can. Is it the pressure of the labels that I am exposing myself to because the perfectionist just stormed out of me, is it the gremlin on my shoulder making noise blocking myself from my true creativity of writing? Are those labels saying the right things? I am again lost.
How do you keep doing this? Loosing site of your authentic self, walking into the trap listening, watching and feeling others. It’s time to come out of the bud and blossom and not worry what others think. Society has us shaming our job choices, our titles. What’s wrong with going out and getting a job? I have been asked the question about getting a job so often lately and the question paralysis me everytime. So last night I had a dream and answered this question for me. What was my dream?
My dream answered this question for me and its fear. I am afraid with no degree, career and it will become a job where I will be treated with disrespect because for years I have learned that that’s all employees are looking for is respect and their opinion to be heard. Can I handle this or will I be added to the misery list of people hating their jobs and putting their dreams on hold.
” too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears” -les brown
This is huge because who do I think I am. What’s my label then? Am I judging? Because we need an individual to fill all positions. I just recently met a girl who completed an engineering degree and went to work and hated it and walked away and started a business making and selling cosmetics and she’s happy. I chatted with a retired gentlemen recently at Dollarama and he continued to tell me how he loved retirement and how he meets up with four very professional people every two weeks for coffee, he continued to tell me their profession and how nice that they phone him and his wife to meet them regularly. What he continued to say then got me thinking and made me feel sad that so many of us do this. I am only a retired salesperson and with that I looked at him and said, we need sales people as much as we need doctors and no judgement here. Then the lady behind the counter in her fifty’s proceeded to tell us about the judgement and talking down she receives daily. My heart broke for them both, but after my dream last night I am no different. I am looking for a label and one that I haven’t earned yet but will a label give me respect. How do it feel wearing a medal around your neck that you know you don’t deserve? It feels very uncomfortable and why do we need labels? Labels do not define us. You are in the feel good business or you’re not. We are all the same in this world we need all individuals we have people who are depressed and living on the streets because they were probably told that they were a dreamer to think that they can be a musician or artist. If we only knew their secretive dreams, desires and ambitions. We should never judge people because we are all human and we should all be encouraged to be the best version of ourselves that we can be on this given day.
Fear are stories we tell ourselves
Just the other day I was called out on my exposed labels that I have recently given myself because when I was asked what am I? What is my business? I panicked and rambled and then I was called out on who I really am? We concluded exactly who I am today and that is I am an entrepreneur in transition who loves to write and brave new opportunities, I am a wife, a mother and my family and friends are my world. It gave me back my freedom of my authentic self and I will keep working to earn my labels because they will not define me. I am now ok with going out and getting a job and have the freedom to be a creative writer and perfect that as my craft for this season.
What have I learned? It don’t feel good for me to wear a label that I haven’t earned and if you are doing something you love that fills you up, who cares what other people think, you do what you have to do. Remove all labels and today just be nice to the person serving you your coffee, checking in your dollar items, the salesperson who is trying to make a sale to feed his/her family, the janitor at the school is as important as the teacher and remember the homeless are people just like you and I. Let’s forget about the labels and find joy and smile, love and be kind we need more freedom of who we are today and not who we are expected to be. Be who you have to be today and brand yourself to love yourself and always remember we all have potential beyond our labels.
With gratitude and love,
Angela